Category: Money

Working Class

Recently I watched “Sex and the city” (I just love the series) and whenever one of those ladies have a (new) date, they meet for dinner and I wondered:

Is that a rich thing, or did I interact with the wrong people? Or is it a culture thing?

When I was still out there dating, not once did a man suggest to pick me up for dinner! A nice cafe once in a while (and even that was rare) but that was it.

Something tells me, that it is a rich thing indeed. Or maybe something wealthy people or people with a high income are able to do as this is what there clientele, family and friends does.

I, however, belong to the species “working class”. Which is my own fault! I know that! I could have put more effort in when I was still in school. But I didn’t. I belonged to the stupid teenagers who only did what was necessary to get a half way decent final school report.

And after I finished and passed my 3 year job training, yes, even then I was still stupid and didn’t take a good job offer….

Just now I just watched the latest episode of “Shameless” and I can relate to it in so many ways. I have seen families like this, was friends with them and some things happened to me as well.

When I watch this show, I can feel their desperation, I know what’s it like not to know how to survive the month. I know how the head ticks when you have to come up with a solution, how it feels like when all you want to do is cry and run away… it is a tough world…

Don’t get me wrong, my husbands wage is higher than most others and I recently got myself a job as well, but we have 4 children, a loan to pay off, next to no savings (hence why I got a job as well) and want to buy a house in the near future.

We are a happy family and can be lucky to have each other… it is okay to be working class and work hard for your money, but sometimes, just sometimes I wish it was easier and the weight on the shoulders a bit lighter.

That’s all…


I used to be rock ‘n roll….

now I am a boring house wife!!!


I used to be the girl with the nose so high in the clouds,  she could barely see the ground!

I used to be a girl who looked very innocent but shouldn’t be underestimated!

I used to be a very wild child… quiet… who didn’t look for action, but when someone inflicted it, this girl used to have a big mouth and quick fists!

But that was in an ancient  time when said girl didn’t have 2 or even 4 children. When the girl was still independent, bought the world and had only herself to look after!

The girl decided it is time for children. Which she didn’t regret but she didn’t think about that the older the wee ones get, the more they cost!!!

Instead of… partying hard at the weekend until she and her friends where friendly asked by staff to leave, boarding planes to go shopping abroad, going somewhere and turning up days later without knowing what happened, deciding from one second to the other to get a new tattoo… this girl became a mommy and with being a mommy comes a lot of responsibility!

But I tell you what:

Though this girl should know better, she REFUSES, YES  R.E.F.U.S.E.S  to grow up!

I WILL take my old life back! Maybe I don’t run as wild as I used to, but I will be rock ‘n roll again!

It is just a matter of time!



My One Mistake

Normally I am a person who believes in not regretting! I believe that we make mistakes to learn from  and later in time we look back and can laugh about it, make a face or just shake the head and say “happens”.

But my one and only biggest mistake ever was to meet the biological father of my two older children!

If I could go back in time, I would run in the opposite direction instead of getting involved with him.

I am not angry with him because he left me with back then a 1 1/2 and 3 year old, no, I am angry because he changed so much after the split!

I did my very best to raise my children to good polite human beings, I taught them how to tie their shoe laces, how to cycle and even how to swim. I helped them in school and drove them to friends… taught them  not to judge a book by its cover and so much more!

I worked to get food on the table, clothes on the children and a roof over their head.

And what did I get from him? No support whatsoever! No child support until recently (and even for that I had to beg and threat with a lawyer) only negativity and regular threats that he will go to the court to get the children.

And that from a person, who was always broke because he can’t handle money, sometimes didn’t even have a place to live and not even had regular long lasting jobs!

In front of others he always played the good caring loving father, but in real, he only saw the children 3 times PER YEAR!!! No phone calls or emails during the year, no letters. And now that we live abroad, it is only once per year.

But the worst, he involved my precious two innocent babies in our fights, just before when we moved house and once didn’t even want to bring them back!

My children did not have a clue what was going on, I always acted like everything was okay, never let a bad word slip my lips in front of them and what did he do? He talked with them about us! Twisted their minds, made them cry, told them lies…

Fortunately now that they are a bit older they have seen through his game.

I would have forgiven him all the above, but involving children in adult arguments? No! That is a big NO!

So yes, my biggest mistake is, that I met the biological father of my children and if I would be heartless, brainless and dumb like him, I would even say “no” to visits between them.

But I am a good mom, my children have to make up their own mind and decide whether they want to see him or not!

I know God is a loving person and forgives, but sometimes I wish, he would make a bus hit my ex very hard, reverse and do it again… I don’t wish him the death, of course not! But a bit of torture would satisfy me!


Thoughts on the one word prompt “mistake”

The Money-Dilemma…

It is a pain in the ass when you are not rich but want a nice new pair of trainers….

The desired item is this beauty:

I just put two items for sale on Ebay and hope to get at least 60,-£ together. . .

You might think to yourself, “it is just one pair of trainers, it will not hurt to buy them…”

Well maybe I should have mentioned, that we will be around 600,-£ short for a couple of month because the army as forgotten to charge us for our house and as a good citizen we have to pay it back.

Those 600,-£ makes me want to cry and I cry even more, because I long for those trainers my feet desperately need, sob… sob… it is even my size which is quite difficult to get when you’ve got tiny mice feet…

Maybe I curl into a ball for a bit and hope for a wonder…


I better get a move on and pick up little Miss Mouse from school.