Category: Huge Ego

Women’s Business Clothes

Today I was reading one of my 5 gossip magazines. Yes, occasionally… okay let me rephrase that: Once per month I feel the need to buy a couple of magazines (Cosmopolitan is a monthly must-have) to read about gossip, get the latest info about exercise and gadgets and health and look at eye watering expansive clothes I probably never be able to afford!

There you go!

So back to what I wanted to write about in the first place:

In “Grazia” was an Artikel about women’s business clothes from a lady which name I can’t remember. She is high in finance business but her wardrobe….. well…. how to put it to not offend the good lady which I reckon is in her late 40s…. hmmmm…..

Dull? Boring? Frumpy? Probably all together!

Okay, she works in finance and you should look the part, but the way she wore the clothes made her at least 10 years older. I found it boring and am sure I am not the only one.

What would I give to see her in a Fred Perry dress, ha ha ha. Or in this beautiful pink long floaty Me&Em dress (I am waiting desperately for a reduction as I don’t want to cough up £350,- but it is so so pretty, you look like a big yummy candy).

No really! I think if we wouldn’t take us all so serious, even in such a demanding job, we would be more open minded when it comes to appearance.

There, said it all.

Franky

Being High Maintenance

Recently I came across a blog where the person found it offensive to be called

“High Maintenance”.

I freely admit that I am a high maintenance sort of woman. And why not? There is nothing wrong with that, if you ask me.

When you google high maintenance it will show you the following:

A high maintenance person will require a lot of attention, time, money and/or effort!

Of course a person like me requires a lot attention. The key here is the right kind of attention in a specific time frame. If I call you, and you must be special in order for me to do so, pick up- after the first ring, please! When I am about to meet you, do yourself a favour, hang on to your life and be on time!!! When I want to go for a run, do join me, it will be fun- at least for me and that is the most important thing, right?!

And yes, I do invest in my body first. I like to look nice! And you like it when I do, right?

I shave, plug, trim, exfoliate and pamper myself with the best tools and ingredients on the market. Why? Because I can! Because I want to!

And if you want to brighten my day, show up with a single flower (I prefer sunflowers), a bottle of whiskey and polished shoes. Thank you very much and yes, that is necessary!

You might not be able to give what I desire? “Heck, where there’s a way, there’s a will”, she says, pouting.

You want to stay in my life long-term? Darling the answer is as easy as breathing:

All I want for you is to reach for the brightest star on a clear night and serve it to me on a silver plate! I won’t settle for less! And once I got that star, there is no stopping me- I always aim for more. Of course I do!

What you get in return?!?

The best wicked person I can possibly be! Friend or foe- you will love me!

Franky

My Husband

I have to announce something.

I have to give some big credit to my husband for still loving me!

A while ago we had a big talk about what is going not so well in our relationship and what made me so unhappy.

All relationships, especially long term relationships have their ups and downs and with a bit of luck couples will make it through- together.

I told and asked my husband to be a bit more open minded when it comes to other guys and said that I wouldn’t have a problem if he would kiss another woman.

Now my husband does not want to share me! Of course not! I am awesome! I am a great catch and unique in all my  little odd ways!

After such revelation, many a man would probably have showed me the door, thinking that I don’t love him. But love has nothing to do with the idea to maybe kiss another man/woman, it is the fun side that comes with it….

However. Like I said, my husband said “no” and I am sticking to it.

My point is:

Though I know that it is very easy to fall in love with me, it is also very hard to keep loving me because of the way I am, the way I (re-)act, the (sometimes hurtful) things I say and because of my selfishness!

But the man I have keeps on loving me despite all the above!

So, here I raise a glass to you:

I love you too!

Franky

Influencer

So often we hear of influencer. People talk about them on the radio, tv shows, they are mentioned and even suggested in magazines.

And every time I wonder. Why do these people exist?

Do we really need others to suggest lifestyles? What to wear, what to eat, what to think?

Have we forgotten how to use our own brains? Do influencers really want copy cats?

We don’t need to look at other people to decide what for a person we wanna be.

You want to wear bogey green shorts with a peachy fluffy blouse and combat boots? Go for it!

You want to do things your own way and don’t want to budge from your opinion? I am all for it!

You want to get piss drunk for no good reason? I am coming right over!

Don’t let other people define you!

Don’t let them tell you how to live your life! The reins are yours alone, you lead the way!

Just be the best person you want to be! That is all that matters!

Franky

Me And My Commitment Issues

Usually, or often, it is us women who blame the men that they don’t want to commit, but here I am, still sitting in my stripy blue/white cotton short pyjamas, holding my hands up, admitting that I have commitment issues!

I might even go so far as to say, I am a commitment phobe!

When you think of commitment, you think (romantic) relationships. Well okay, let’s start there:

Before my husband, I have been in relationships. Some longer, some maybe just a couple of month, weeks even. At some point I either got bored ore annoyed or I cheated which meant I would walk out of the relationship anyway. However, at some point I was told, I don’t have a heart because I just didn’t want to fully commit to the relationship. What was the reasonable thing to do? I walked away. All I ever wanted was easy peasy relationships and if that didn’t work out, even after a (lame) attempt to fix it, I just quit. Someone once proposed to me. The way and the ring was all wrong but I went with it at first. But every time I looked at the ring it made me sweat, I felt physically ill even thinking about being married (to that guy). I just couldn’t do it! I didn’t want this!

And even now that I am (happily) married, I often find it hard to stay committed which has nothing to do with wanting other men or romantic feelings it has more to do with me just wanting to do what I want, when I want. But when you are married, and you have children and a house together, you can’t just walk away when something annoys you, you have to work it out which sometimes can drive one (me) mental. And of course there is the thing that I am a flirt which drives hubby to his ends wits. But hey I am what I am, just can’t help it.

Am I committed to my friends? Here I can give you a big fat YES! I am loyal to my friends and I know they know it! Though sometimes I fear because of the distance some of my friends could just befriend other nice people…. hahahaha who am I kidding here?! There is no better friend but me! Ts, the thought alone….

But except from friendships I can’t seem to commit to anything!

I can’t commit to a hairstyle or length. I think I had almost every haircut possible in my 40 years.

I also can’t commit to a style clothes wise. I wore everything from hippie, to punk, 50s 90s….But one thing I never do: I never go with the latest trend. The things you currently find in my cupboard is lots of Fred Perry, skirts and long floaty dresses. And cashmere cardigans and jumpers. No jeans! And only two Fred Perry chinos for terrible weather.

When it comes to jobs it is the same thing: I studied to become a legal secretary but after 3 years I got trained to become a piercer. Two years ago I studied to become a sports massage therapist. Do I still work as a therapist? Of course not! Past summer I went to Ireland for work. I left after 2 month because I didn’t like Dublin (sorry Dubliners). Now I work in hospitality again and the only thing me not leaving is because the drive is only 25 minutes! I received an invitation for a job interview (two days ago) as a typist in Edinburgh city centre. I did not reply… yet. It would be more money, but also far more travel time. I would need to get to the next train station as everyone who ever went to Edinburgh in morning rush hour does understand why I don’t want to drive. Awful. Just awful. I mean if I switch jobs again, my CV looks like I do nothing but job hopping… Decisions, decisions…

A place to live? I can’t even commit to that! Yes, we bought a house and the area is lovely. But I would love to go much further north west! I feel restless thinking about living here for the rest of my life! I thought it’s what I want, what I need. But once again, I am wrong. I love moving house, I love seeing new places.

I can’t even commit to my WordPress. Instead of writing and committing to one topic, I write about everything and nothing.

Maybe commitment in my case equals boredom. Or maybe the feeling that if I commit I am stuck and don’t move forward.

Life is full of exciting opportunities and I just don’t want to miss out on anything, I guess. Does it make me sad that I can’t commit? No! I like the way I am! I am full of life and want to take it all!

So I try to keep on running. I mean, flying! Flying sounds much nicer. Flying wherever the wind blows me!

Franky

Odd Commentary

Two days I received not one, but two odd commentary from two different people.

When I was sitting at the hair dresser’s, we were talking about my hairdresser’s life, what she did before and when we came to children, I told her I have 4.

“4!!! Children?! 4??? You are married? Really? I thought you are single the way you look….”

I know, (she said so herself) she meant it in a nice way, but I wonder:

Am I not marriage material because I am heavily tattooed? Don’t I look like the type who could be married? I found that really odd.

Forward hours later:

My sister phones me. We updated each other what happened in each others lives in the past week and so I told her all proud, that I finally got my throat tattooed. And so she says:

“You still get tattooed?!?” She sounded really surprised, maybe even a bit shocked.

Why wouldn’t I still get tattooed? Are only people under 40 are allowed to get tattooed? And/or people with less than 4 children? Unmarried single human beings? I don’t even look 40! Usually people would say I look 30!

Maybe it was just her overall stuck up opinion on how to live your life. Don’t get me wrong, I love her and I wished I could see her on a daily basis, but we are two very different people so I don’t hold her odd comment against her… but it still made me wonder.

Franky

Tattoos, Work & Hypocrisy

Around Christmas I was bored, browsing on my Facebook account and an article popped up, posted from my former colleague who still works at this high prestige hotel.

It has shown the pastry head chef, covered in tattoos in all his glory along with what he has created and other colleagues who helped him in accomplishing such an amazing art of work!

But my point is:

When I still worked amongst them, front of house, I was nearly banned to the back of house because you could see a bit of my neck tattoos! I was told to cover it up, with plasters or make up. Eventually I cut my beautiful locks so I could wear my hair open and therefor most of it was covered!

And no, it wasn’t guests who complained about my appearance, it was someone high and mighty from the same department.

So, I ask you: Why is it, that they basically given me the ultimatum of covering up or back of house and he (the pastry head chef) is allowed to proudly wear his tattoos??? Is it because he is a man and I am a women? Is it because he is a chef and I was only a Chef de Rang? What? What is the difference? Please do enlighten me!

If you ask me, it is sheer hypocrisy! That article was well written, with nice pictures and kudos to the head chef for the accomplishment, but it really really annoyed me! I thought all people should be treated equally?! Obviously this is not the case in this establishment!…

So, I mentioned in a blog before, that I will get the tattoos I always wanted (just waiting for an appointment in Glasgow). And do you know what? I wanted tattoos on my hands and neck since I was a little girl, but it also scares me- a lot! Scares me because I fear not to find employment again. But if we all hide our desires, nothing in society will change!

Franky

Men & Fat

Over the past two years I put on weight. It was gradually. Either I didn’t realise it or I didn’t care to realise. Either way, my point is, my husband did not tell me! Which really annoys me!

And no beloved male readers, there is no catch! I for one, want to get told, when I put on weight! And no, I will not throw a fit or cry all day long about how mean you are!

I mean, you fall in love with someone. Because of their looks and of course because of the intellect! So when one of the couple gradually puts on weight, it is not what you fell in love with and no they don’t love the excess weight! Not the one who gains it nor the one who has to live with said person.

Or did you ever hear someone say:

“Oooooh I love your cute love-handles and I especially love how they jiggle when you move…. and your bat arms, how huge they are….. or oh I just love how the fat really pushes out your cellulite, I hope you will put even more on…. or I could kiss that double chin of yours all day long….or it looks so hot when your ass tries to eat your shorts….

Not ever did I hear someone say something like that! Ever!

Of course you are still loved when you put on weight, but they love you as a person but they don’t love the extra weight! And no this is not fat shaming! This is pointing out the obvious!

So please men, do yourself a favour, when your partner puts on weight, say, or if you fear for your life, at least do something about it!

But if you are truly happy for your partner to get bigger and your partner is the same, than of course just dismiss the above!

As for me and my fat, I am on the way to recovery and back to my former self by eating healthy and exercise and sleep more!

Franky

Don’t Let Them Dictate Your Looks!!!

Ever came across an employer who did not like the way you look?

I did! More than once!

Usually I did everything possible to please my bosses. In my case the culprit are my tattoos.

My arms, back, neck and chest are covered but I am still able to hide it under clothes.

When I worked for airports at the check-in and gates I had to wear long sleeved blouses and wear dark tights as I am also tattooed on one leg. I was happy to cover up as despite the bad payment I loved this job!

Every time I go for a job interview I make sure to wear long sleeves and have my hair open so you can’t really see anything.

For 8 months I worked for a very famous 5* hotel here in Scotland. During my induction week we were told, that visible tattoos are no problems as the hotel wants to loosen up.

But 4 months into my job I had several discussions with supervisors etc. about my neck tattoos. In the end the call came from high up, from a person who never even talked to me himself…. he wanted me banned to the back of house, out of guests view! Or to cover my tattoos with plasters. No guest ever said anything, but yes, of course I put a plaster all around my neck! Not that it is unhealthy…. or warm… or itchy….

Instead I cut off my hair so I could wear it without a hair bubble. Yes! That’s what I did. I CUT MY HAIR!!!

But you know what? I am sick of people reducing me to my tattoos!

So many people scream for equality, same wages, acceptance of all sexes, religions, colours, races and so much more.

Everyone wishes to live in a world where people respect each other, so why not tolerate people with more than one tattoo?

If heavily tattooed people keep on hiding their art, they will never get the desired position no matter how suitable they might be. No one will see beyond the colour. No one will see the talented the person.

So I am saying no and stand up for myself. I am a hard worker and if others can’t see that, than they are not the right fit!

Guess there will be a couple of trips to the tattoo shop very soon.

Franky

 

Why don’t I have a specific style???

I recently realised, I don’t really have a specific style and wonder why that is?

Ok, I had a hippie phase, a grunge(ish) style, a 50s style, a “house” style but nothing ever stuck.

It is the same with my hair, I wore my hair in all styles and lengths.

It is almost as if I still try to figure out who I am without really realising it.

The only thing that sticks with me is cashmere cardigans (girls, whoever tells you, you don’t need another cashmere cardigan because you already own 32- they flat out LIE)!

So in my wardrobe you find a lot of Fred Perry dresses and polo shirts, you find knee lengths skirts, even a maxi dress, you even find 2 pairs of chinos (Fred Perry as well) and of course cashmere jumpers and cardigans.

At the current moment I am all into barefoot shoes which, ones your feet got used to it  and stop hurting, are the most comfortable shoes EVER!

But a specific style? No I don’t have one! Maybe I will never have one, who knows what I look like in a years time (hopefully as beautiful as I am know, ha ha ha).

Franky