What you should (not) do as a hotel guest

Well since I am back in hospitality as it is convenient, I would like to tell what you should, or shouldn’t do in a hotel room:

  1. Don’t scatter your rubbish all around the room AND bathroom. There are bins, they don’t bite you and if the bin is already overflowing because you have been on a shopping spree and pigged out, just put it next to it. The rubbish will not walk out on its own (though it would be nice)!
  2. Don’t leave your wet towels in the bed. WHY? WHY do you do that?!? There is no logic behind it other than that the duvet/mattress will get wet, too ! Do I look like a dryer? Oh you don’t know?! Well no, I don’t!
  3. When you have sex, and yes, we can hear you without having our ears stuck to your door, could you please wrap your condoms (though high praise for protection) in something so that it doesn’t proudly stares back at us when we empty the bin? That would be great!
  4. Of course you can bring your dog with you. We love dogs! But what we not love is the odour that comes from your beloved pooch…or the doggy treats! So could you open the windows before you vacate your room?
  5. When you get up, open at least the curtains. And if you open the curtains and a window, well that would be the cherry on the cake. Nothing worse than when you get hit by stale morning fart/breath air and the radiator on full blast!
  6. And last: Appreciate the people who clean and tidy for and after you. Tipp them! Even if it is only a £1. Yes, we know you paid for the room and the cleaning, but hey, are you that messy at your home? Didn’t think so!

Franky

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