Month: March 2019

Why do we cry???

We often hear

“…..let it all out…. just cry…..you feel better after it….”

We cry because we are sad, because we are angry, because we are disappointed and probably because of lots of other things, but does it really make you feel better? Does it change the view or the reason you cried?

We cry because basically we are hurt!

I recently attended a friends funeral. When I heard the sad news I thought I kept it good together. There was a small tear….

I was fine driving down to Wales. I was fine checking into my hotel and have a stroll around the little town and the beach. I slept okay.

I was fine while standing with many others in front of the doors to the little chapel and I also kept it together during mess but when my late friends widow hugged me I really, really had to swallow my tears back and when I was on my way to my car I felt them roll down my cheeks.

So why is that? Is it because I don’t get to talk to him or see him again? Is it because of missed opportunities?

Why do we cry when we argue or when a boyfriend/girlfriend breaks up with you or your partner divorces you?

Is it because we know we will not share our future together? Is it because we know we want have anymore nice moments together? Is it because the future is unclear now?

Looking at it from a distance we should know these things happen, people die, people can turn on you, people don’t want to be with you, it’s just how the world is and yet we are still hurt by actions.

I personally think, “letting it all out” does not make me feel better, if anything it makes me feel worse, tired and yes even tired of life and how life treats me! Not to mention my eyes! After a good  long cry I look like a boxer after a 12 round fight, really no kidding.

It would be nice if there was a button to switch certain emotions on and off, don’t you agree?

Franky

Letting go of resentment

The one and only Russell Brand recently talked about resentment on his blog.

Now many think Russell Brand is not an adequate role model for such things, but you know it got me thinking for quite some time and I came to the conclusion he is right.

Resentment eats you up. It is not healthy.

And thinking about his words and about the things or actions others did that I resented, I realised I have to let go in order to live a happier life!

You could say the following is a bit of an open letter.

So here it goes. The things that bothered me the most, things I resented, things which just made me feel bad:

Christian, I forgive you for not being able to be my best friend anymore! I do understand your reasons and though I still miss our friendship I am able to let go now.

Dares, I forgive you for making me feel unimportant in your life which eventually ended our friendship. I believe now that you did the best you could, but my standards have been probably too high to reach and I am sorry it ended like it did. But I wish you all the best from the bottom of my heart!

For my brother whom I haven’t spoken in 15 long years: I forgive you for letting me down in several occasions! I should have just taken you the way you are! I also forgive you for hurting my feelings all those years ago when it came to the final blow. I, we, should have been more civilised and talk about it. I still love you and ever will and wherever you are, I hope you are doing good and that you are truly happy!

To my parents: I forgive you for not being able to make me feel loved! I know you might not have know better but I believe you did the best you could. After all, sometimes it is hard to love your teenager as I should know best as they can drive you mental and I was by far no angel.

Those things have eaten me up and it feels good to finally be able to let go. It is like weight is lifted of my shoulders and I can breath much better.

Franky

 

Road Rage

I am a very patient person (my husband would laugh now, but I believe I am!)

But when it comes to driving…. well it is not that I would beeb my horn or show others the stinky finger but I wonder what other drivers possesses to do certain things:

For one:

Do not buy a fast car if you don’t know how to work it. Where is the point in owning a fast car when you drive 30mph on a 60 road??? Is it annoy others? I don’t care how nice and shiny your car is from behind, you know?

Second:

Why do you break every, yes EVERY SINGLE TIME before a corner??? Just step off the gas on time or don’t drive so fast!

Third:

There is no need to drive 20mph in snowy conditions on straight bits! I know this is Scotland and often there is no grid to be seen, but heck, 20mph?! Really? On flat and straight bits? What do you do behind the wheel? Biting it? If you are too scared to drive in snow stay at home!

Fourth:

When you are on the motorway, don’t drive on the middle or far right lane when the first  (second) is totally free! What is going on in your head? Do you think you drive a tank and therefor the first lane is too narrow for your itsy-bitsy car? Ts….

The above are really annoying things.

Just. Don’t. Do. It! Thanks

Franky