Month: November 2016

I can not let go


I was and probably will always be your favourite and that makes me smile as it makes me feel special. I have seen it in your eyes and heard it in your warm voice. It was your giggles I loved the most.

I can’t remember what you smelled like but the cloud of softness when you hugged me is still present.

You where there for me when no one else was. You put me straight and told me what was needed. You where and still are worried about me.

You are “old and tired” you once  said and I replied, “but I will need you forever, I don’t have anyone else but you”.

I have seen the sadness in your eyes when you looked at me, the lost child with the brave smile.

I miss being with you in the lively kitchen, miss our long conversations on the phone. I hear your voice, I hear your giggles, it is right there but I wished it was right next to me.

I know I have to let you go. But I am not ready. I would like to tell you, “it is okay. You can leave. I am able to stand on my own feed”.

But my heart is too heavy in my chest.

I am sorry, so sorry but I can not let go…



Relationships shouldn’t be difficult!!!

I am following an interesting blog of a women who is currently dating but she hasn’t found Mr. Right yet.

For some reason early in her relationships their are situations which makes being together rather difficult than relaxing. In the end they call it off…. or they try it a bit later again, just to realize it really doesn’t work.

Often I would like to tell her, that she should move on, that he seems just not really interested in her, but you know what? If you don’t realize it yourself, it doesn’t matter what someone else says!

I have seen this all before! In my own previous relationships. Sometimes when something got difficult, like a very jealous boyfriend who just couldn’t bring himself to trust me, I just left…. sometimes I was so stupid to stay and work it out…. and work it out….. and work it out….. in the end my brain started to function again after all the “hard work” and I left because there was no working out.

Now I wonder why  people try to work things out early on? Why wasting precious time trying to make it work. There are signs! Why not open your eyes and listen to what is going on!

A relationship shouldn’t be difficult. At least not early in a relationship. It should be all lovey-dovey, it should just feel right and if it doesn’t feel right, why wasting time? Why not move on to someone who fits us better?

Sure, when time goes by, you can always hit a rocky path, but this is the rocky path you walked  together. And that is the point:

If it fits, you choose the path together and walk in one direction. If it gets rocky, you help one another.

If you meet someone, dating someone and it turns out you walk in opposite directions, save yourself heartache, leave before it starts to hurt!

Tell yourself, “it’s not meant to be! Someone better will wait around the corner!”

Just saying!