Many times I was told, that I´ve got a heart cold as steel when I dumped a boyfriend. When I realized that the crush I once had, was mistaken by just excitment and even that died, I knew I had to end things. So either I did it face to face or when my back then boyfriend lived too far away over the telephone.
Of course I shuddered by the thought of ending things- again. But I just said it like it was:
“Hello, I want to end things because I am not in love with you.”
And once it was out I felt really good, relieved that it was over and that person out of my life. Only one time I felt really sorry and thought maybe it is easier not to contact, phone or see him so he would get the hint. But noooo, one day he just showed up on my doorstep all loved up. With his clothes for a whole weekend (he lived one hour away) and I thought “oh great what does he want? That is Mr. Stupidity in person!” But still feeling sorry (for the first and last time in my life) I let him, my annoyance was written all over my face and I questioned him “what do you want here? Actually I had plans. And what is that for a big disgusting spot on your face?!”
No kiss or anything for the entire weekend and he still didn´t get the hint. After a week he phoned me to ask if anything was okay (bing, finally) and I said it like it is:
“Actually I thought you would get the hint, but since you don´t I wanted to tell you that I am dumping you.”
He took it like a real man, what he didn´t take like a real man was my request not to phone me ever again, because we broke up and I didn´t even want to be friends with him anymore. I think he phoned me three more times until he gave up…
My mother says I am a cold fish, only because it happens that sometimes I forget birthdays. My mothers and fathers. Yes, that happens, so what? They have forgotten some of my birthdays as well but the world is still moving. But apparently the fact that they have forgotten mine is something different! Do I make a fuss, no, because I don´t care!
I do have one dear friend who had to get used to me at first, though we get along very well and have a lot in common, but the way I am, the way I tell/say thinks, so blunt, sometimes she was taken aback but also told me straight away. Of course I have told her, that my intention wasn´t to hurt her feelings and that she shouldn´t take offence and thinks I say personal.
I am the kind of person who teaches her children not to start a fight because that is very wrong. People who start a fight can´t articulate. BUT if they get hit by someone, they have to fight back as fast and strong they can and also that they shouldn´t be scared. Yes, maybe they receive a good (or bad) batter, but the other person will think twice before trying it again! I should know, the man or rather the boy back then inside me was involved in some fights during my school years. Yes, maybe I´ve risked a big lip every now and then, but I never started a fight, that was just to defend me and my dignity!!!
I am also the kind of person who just leaves the house without leaving a note and come back whenever I please. I don´t even think about to take my mobile. Happens.
To be honest, I am glad I am a woman. I am certain I would be an awful man! I mean, my ego is already so huge, it doesn´t fit through any door!
If I was a man for a week ( a day would not be enough), I would look incredible hot. Tall, bald, well-built, green eyes, full lips and tattooed from head to toe. I would be one of the bad guys, a hard bastard. I wouldn´t settle until at least mid 40 and would have (protected) fun with a lot of women. I would have drinks (ooooh nice whisky) with my mates in clubs at weekends and end up with a girl (or two?), having hot rough sex the whole night and once I am finished, I would dismiss her, roll around and fall asleep (just like I do it with my husband!!! ooops did I really just admit that?!)
Of course I would be succesful in my job! Ruthless I would rule my company, take what I want and command my staff but as long they do excellent they would get well paid!
But I am just a good-looking woman with a huge ego who is a bid narcissistic with a hot bad ass husband who leaves the bad ass attitude outside the house and I am doing just fine!